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2018年瑞安市高一英语现场作文赛优秀作文选集

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2018年瑞安市高一英语现场作文赛优秀作文选集

瑞安市教师发展中心 汇编 2018.6

按:为夯实学生的语言基础,发展语言运用能力,培养学生用英语分析问题和解决问题能力以及批判性思维,我市于20185举行了瑞安市第十四届高中生英语现场作文赛,比赛包括“读后续写”和“概要写作”两部分。现将一等奖优秀作文汇编,共广大师生学习参考。

第一部分 现场作文题及参考答案

I. 读后续写 (50%)

阅读下面短文,根据所给情节进行续写,使之构成一个完整的故事。

John lived in a village with his grandfather. Every morning men went to the farms, and children to the school. Everything was fine. Everyone was happy except John because his grandfather wouldn’t buy him chocolates or change his school bag. “For what are you saving money?” John shouted at his grandfather angrily. “These aren’t necessary and you are a very good boy. Aren’t you, my boy?” smiled his grandfather. He knew John was not as bad as he presented himself. He knew deep down John had a very kind heart. “Yes, I am good. But you are the worst person I have ever met and I hate you.” John said and stormed out of the room to the school. He was getting late as usual.

His life was like this. Every day he fought with his grandfather at least once. His wishes were generally not satisfied, which really upset him. His grandfather wasn’t poor, but he wasn’t ready to spend on chocolates and clothes.

Upon his arrival at school, he heard his friends talking about the story of the unknown. The teacher had yet not come. He placed his ears into the conversation. “Do you know that someone placed five hundred dollars with a message inside Mr. Darwin’s house while he was sleeping.” said his best friend Gum. “Yes. This happened not only to Mr. Darwin but to many needy families. I wonder who did all this, perhaps God!” replied Tom. “My father is very ill. I wish God helps him, too.” said Gum in a low voice. “How great it is to get a surprise!” John thought.

When he returned home, his grandfather was watering the plants in their garden. On seeing him back, his grandfather asked, “How was the day, dear?” “Nothing special.” he said and went inside the house. His grandfather loved gardening, who could be found in the garden almost all the time. And John found it the most boring work ever. He had a strong feeling that his grandfather wouldn’t have become so selfish, if he hadn’t spent so much time alone in the garden.

 

Paragraph 1:

When they were eating dinner, John finally broke the silence.                                                                                

 

Paragraph 2:

In the depth of night, a sound hit John’s ears.                                                                                                                 

 

II. 概要写作 (50%)

阅读下面短文,根据其内容写一篇60词左右的内容概要。

Colleges are attaching too much importance to tests. Students who receive higher scores on the SAT and the ACT are considered to be more intelligent and as a result they are usually admitted to better schools.

However, these tests don’t necessarily ensure one’s future success in life. To become better test-takers than others, some students would like to have more preparations. Several SAT and ACT prep-classes are offered by various companies and individual tutors, giving rich students a better chance to improve their scores. Some students even take medicine before their test. Although it is not proved that taking these drugs will increase a student’s score, the nature of the drug is to increase alertness(敏捷), concentration, and mental processing speed. 

In addition, these tests can’t show some of the skills and characters that are a key part to success. According to Bob Schaeffer of the National Center for Fair and Open Testing, creativity, perseverance and self-discipline(自律)are just a few basic qualities that are useful in the professional world that aren’t measured by these tests. A high test score tells you nothing about how a student will handle the future life or how well they will adapt to their surroundings.

What colleges can do is weigh the students’ academic track, such as what classes they took and how difficult they were, or what extra-curricular activities the students were involved in over their test scores. These things don’t necessarily predict what the students will do in college, but if the admissions would pay more attention to four years of hard work instead of three hours of filling in bubbles(泡状框), they might get more successful and well-rounded group of graduates.    

   “概要写作参考答案:

Colleges are too dependent on tests in admitting their new students.(要点1Nevertheless, these tests, in which students can get high scores by taking extra pre-classes or medicines, cannot guarantee them a rosy future.(要点2Besides, these tests are not able to give an accurate picture of students’ full potential.(要点3Therefore, to make sure they can get all-round top graduates, colleges should take the students’ academic track into consideration.(要点4 (77words)

 

第二部分 优秀作文汇编

一、瑞安中学 姜林怡(指导师:张莹

1.读后续写

When they were eating dinner, John finally broke the silence. “Today I heard that Mr. Darwin had received a large sum of money, and so had many needy families. Do you think it might be God?” His grandfather smiled ,saying nothing. “Gum said his father is seriously ill, and they need help as well.” This time, the expression of the old man froze. He seemed to be sunk in the deep thought. “Why didn’t God give us the money so that I can get chocolate and a new schoolbag!” John murmured. Obviously, the old man wasn’t listening, he went outside the house, standing alone in the garden. Later, John went to his bed. His mind was messed up with all those exciting wishes, like getting chocolates. Gradually he fell asleep, dreaming that God secretly arrived and brought him countless chocolates and a new school bag!

   In the depth of night, a sound hit John’s ears. He could tell that it was the wooden door. Someone must be pulling it. With his heart jumping restlessly, John slipped out of bed to see whether it was the “God”. Disappointingly, he only found that it was just his grandfather. But something was weird. Out of curiosity, he followed his grandfather who was walking on the lonely path. Suddenly his grandfather stopped at a shabby door. To his surprise, it was Gum’s house. Then he saw his grandfather push the door carefully, trying not to make a sound, and placed a roll of money secretly. All of a sudden, complicated emotions overwhelmed him. Everything was explained. He rushed back to his home and buried himself in the bed. Ever since that night, John had never cried for chocolates and school bags any more, because he knew that God was always on his side.

2. 概要写作

  College admissions are now over bounded with tests. But these tests cannot guarantee students’ future success, while some students take extra courses and even medicines to enhance their scores. Furthermore, the tests neglect many skills and characters that is significant in life. Thus, if colleges are aiming at recruiting more successful elites, they should focus more on students' academic track.(60words)

二、瑞安十中杨若彤(指导师:施昌燕

1. 读后续写

When they were eating dinner, John finally broke the silence. He hesitated for a moment before taking a deep breathShouting at his grandfather, “My friends all stated that some needy families got help from God with a lot of money. How wonderful it is to get such a big surprise! ” In a split second, John continued, “ Gum wished God would help his ill father. He seemed to be overwhelmed by financial pressure to treat his father.” John’s grandfather seized his wrist hard, and inquired eagerly,“Gum ,is he living near us?” Impatiently, John added, “ yes, but it is none of your business! You are the most selfish man I have ever seen!”Fuming with great anger, John dashed towards his room, throwing himself in bed but couldn’t get a sound sleep up to the late night. 

In the depth of night, a sound hit John’s ears. Surprised, John felt his way in the direction of sound in the dark room, only to see his grandfather’s shadow moving around the table with something red. After approaching his grandfather, he found an envelope with a large sum of money inside and a message with the name of Gum. John understood soon, standing there motionlessly. His grandfather cast a quick glance at him. John was somewhat, astonished at how to begin their conversation .After a long while, he whispered, “so sorry am I to have misunderstood you”       

2.概要写作:

Currently, many colleges think it important to choose students with their high scores in tests. Nevertheless, students’ futures don’t just depend on scores for some of them take pre-classes or even medicine before exams in order to get good marks. Additionally, some basic skills and useful qualities related to success can’t be tested only through small exams. Therefore, the most important thing is that colleges should pay more attention to students’academic track towards success instead of the tests’scores.  78w

三、瑞安中学 项怡昊(指导师:张莹 

1. 读后续写

When they were eating dinner, John finally broke the silence. “It was said that many needy families in our town were helped. How much I wish I could be given the sweet chocolates and a new school bag!” Grandfather just smiled, saying, “But you know, God only helps those who is really in need.” He tried putting his arms around John’s shoulder, but only to be pushed away. “It can never be even worse to have a grandfather, like you, so mean!” With anger filling him all over, John hit grandfather’s chest, threw away the knife and fork, rushed into his bedroom and slammed the door, making a loud noise. He lay on the wooden bed, staring at the ceiling, tears trickling down his face. Gradually, the sweet thought of the arrival of the God comforted him a little, and let him fall asleep soon.

   In the depth of night, a sound hit John’s ears. “What happened? Is there a thief?” John thought, slipped down the bed and paced to see what happened on earth. He stood in the shadow behind the door, recognizing that it was his grandfather who was stepping downstairs, trying his best not to make any noise. Curiosity drove him to follow his grandfather, went out of their house, down the street, and finally arrived at a building opposite the church. “It is Gum’s house.” John thought, "What would my mean grandfather do here?" .By the moonlight, he noticed his grandfather walking inside the garden and placing the money on the step. At the moment, John froze with shock as if rooted on the ground, but he soon realized where he was, turned around and rushed back to their house. Deeply moved by grandfather, John left a message on his pillow, saying, “I know, God only helps those who is really in need.

2. 概要写作

Colleges overvalue tests as the standard of admitting students. But tests cannot guarantee students' future success for they may cause unfairness resulting from some extra pre-classes and drugs. Besides, tests can’t reflect students’ full potential accurately. Therefore, to gain more all-round top graduates, colleges should consider students' academic track rather than tests. (52words)

四、塘下中学 翁俊杰(指导师:余小芬

1.读后续写

When they were eating dinner, John finally broke the silence. “Someone placed money inside the house of many needy families.” said John, with a somewhat curious look. “It was perhaps God that helped them!” On hearing this, his grandfather just smiled, “That’s very nice. You should follow his example…” Feeling kind of impatient, John replied in a cold tone, “I will. But never will you be so kind!” Away went he, leaving his grandfather, watching his stubborn back. Shortly after burying his head in the pillow, he fell asleep.

In the depth of night, a sound hit John’s ears. He tossed and turned, unable to fall asleep again. Out of curiosity, he rose from the bed to see what was happening. To his surprise, his grandfather went out secretly. Noiselessly, he followed his grandfather. The next scene really rooted him to the ground for a while---his grandfather was putting money inside Gum’s house. A feeling of shame suddenly arose in his heart. Without hesitation, he ran to his grandfather. “S-Sorry…”shy as he was, the words kept coming out. “I’m more than lucky to have a grandfather like God!” Still a gentle smile on the face, his grandfather wiped the tears welling up in his eyes, caressed his head tenderly and embraced him, whispering, “John, you are a good boy!”                                                 

2. 概要写作

Thinking highly of tests, colleges usually admit students who get higher marks. However, the results of the tests cannot guarantee an absolutely successful future, for some students depend on pre-classes or even drugs to get higher marks. Besides, too limited content in the tests makes it hard to discover students’ full potential. Therefore, it is not only scores but academic performances and years of hard work that should be focused on to get all-round top graduates. (76 words)

五、瑞安中学 胡慧静(指导师:胡静

1.读后续写

     When they were eating dinner, John finally broke the silence. ”Do you know Gum’s dad?” ”Yeah, He’s badly ill.” His grandfather said peacefully, as if it had been nothing serious.” Gum is my best friend. I hope…I mean, please give me some money. They need some help.” Never had John begged his grandfather like this. ”They won’t accept it.” What his grandfather said indeed annoyed John. He shouted,” I suppose it is you that don’t want to give away money rather than they won’t accept it! Why are you always so selfish? Are you iron-hearted?” John couldn’t contain his anger. He jumped into his room and shut his door violently, which made a strong noise. Frustrated, John turned over back and forth and couldn’t fall asleep.

     In the depth of night, a sound hit John’s ears. It sounded as if someone was moving a heavy thing. Curiosity drove him up. He slowly opened the door, for fear that any noise would make him discovered. What surprised him was that he saw his grandfather pack something up and leave home. ”What will the selfish man do?” He murmured. His mind raced. He held his breath and followed his grandfather. Eventually, they arrived at Gum’s house. As he saw his grandfather sticking a message to the package and placing it at Gum’s door, so astonished was he that he stood there, as if rooted on the ground. ”It’s God!” Tears welled up in his eyes and rolled down his cheeks. He flew to his nicest grandfather and hugged him tightly. ”Thank you, my dearest grandfather.”

2. 概要写作

Tests matter much to colleges, by which they judge students’ intelligence. But these tests can’t predict one’s future success, for some students take special classes and even medicine to get higher scores. Moreover, these tests fail to reflect one’s fundamental quality to success, like reactions to the life along with methods to fit in with the world. Consequently, to improve the quality of graduates selected ,colleges ought to value students’ academic track rather than test scores.

六、瑞安第四中学 姜蔚阳(指导师:苏安娜

1. 读后续写

When they were eating dinner, John finally broke the silence. “Grandfather, what about changing my school bag?” John asked with great expectation. “No, it’s not necessary”, his grandfather refused, as usual. There was a dead silence. John decided to try again, “Everyone has a new one, and they’ll laugh at me.” But grandfather just shook his head without saying any more. Tearing welling up in his eyes, John could hardly contain his anger. Glaring at his grandfather, John shouted, “You are such a selfish person. You couldn’t even satisfy my little wish!” So depressed was John that he rushed into his room, slammed the door and drowned himself in great sorrows.

In the depth of night, a sound hit John’s ears. John got up and found his grandfather walk outside the house. Curiosity drove him to follow his grandfather all the way. Much to his astonishment, his selfish grandfather was quietly placing a large amount of money with a message inside Gum’s house. John couldn’t believe his eyes, “Oh, my god! My grandfather is the God!” Seized with great surprise, he ran to his grandfather and gave him a big hug. “I am so sorry that I misunderstood you and I am so sorry for those rude words, you’re truly a kind person.” John said, teas rolling down his cheeks. “You see, son, there are a lot of needy families that need our help.” That night, John fell asleep with a new understanding of his grandfather and the meaning of “selfish”. What he learnt most was that people should have a kind heart to help others rather than the desire to have more.

2. 概要写作

Test scores are acknowledged to be very significant by colleges, which can bring high scores students better college offers. Nevertheless, these tests can’t guarantee students’ future success; for there are many things they can do to improve the scores. Furthermore, students’ true qualities cannot be told by tests. If colleges can take Students’ academic track and their four years of hard work into consideration, they can cultivate real good graduates.

七、瑞安十中 杨喆(指导师: 郑爽

1. 读后续写

    When they were eating dinner, John finally broke the silence. "Grandpa, is there a god?" John whispered. Having hesitated for a whilet, slowly, grandfather raised his head with his eyebrow frowning, answering in peace, "No. What happened?" In a spilit second, John murmured, "But Gum said a god always helped needy families by leaving money and a message. His father is badly ill as well." John continued with his eyes brightening, "If I were the god, I would help him. And maybe I would get chocolates to share with others." Grandpa's eyebrow gradually softened, "What an unlucky family…" Speechless, Grandpa made his way to the kitchen to do dishes as usual. Meanwhile, John returned to his room, going to bed with the hope of seeing god in the dream.

   In the depth of night, a sound hit John's ears. Scared but expected, John got up, walked to the door and opened it quietly. Surprisingly, a familiar figure jumped into John's sight. It was his grandpa who was going out and armed with something. Curiosity drove him to follow silently. Nothing was in sight, only a gust of wind blowing violently outside. Step by step, watching him hobbling slowly and tipping his body slightly, John was more puzzled. At exactly that moment, grandpa entered Gum's home. Suddenly, the mystery was totally uncovered. As soon as grandpa came out, John smiled with tears blurring his vision, sobbing, "I'm … so sorry. You're not selfish but very kind…" Gradually, the figures of John and his grandpa vanished in the darkness shoulder to shoulder.

2. 概要写作

Colleges tend to pay much attention to tests, which can't guarantee students' success completely. Meanwhile, prep–classes are set up for rich students. What's worse, to get higher scores, students even take drugs to quicken their speed. Nevertheless, tests hardly show students' characters which are authentically significant for future. Anyway, colleges should attach importance to hard work and acadenic tasks to be successful.

八、瑞安市新纪元高中 温沁宇(指导师:毛绪斌

1. 读后续写

  When they were eating dinner ,John finally broke the silence. “When will you buy me chocolates?”Joah asked again. Grandfather replied, “I should apologize to you. But my money has been spent on a more significant cause.” Seeing satisfaction on his face ,John’s anger boiled over .Without leaving a word ,John threw the bowel and dashed into his room. Lying on his bed ,he was so sad that he couldn’t help crying .Eventually, he fell asleep in the silent night.

Para 2:

  In the depth of night ,a sound hit John’s ears. He went out curiously to see what had happened. To his astonishment ,his grandfather was not at home. About an hour later ,grandfather came back and found John sit there waiting for him. Smiling affectionately, he patted John slightly and whispered , “I think it is time to tell you the reality . I saved the money to help some needy families ,so...”It suddenly occured to John that how kind his grandfather was .Tears came crashing down and John hugged his grandfather tightly. Smiles blossomed on his grandfather’s face because John understood him and determined to help more people in need together with him .

 

2. 概要写作:

Universities are thinking too highly of the tests . However one’s future success doesn’t depend on these tests which cannot show some primary skills and characters. For sure it is better for colleges to pay more attention to process evaluation including classes difficulties and after-class activities rather than solely rely on test results.Only in this way can a school get more fabulous students.

九、瑞安中学 林亨特(指导师:杨丽珍

1. 读后续写

When they were eating dinner, John finally broke the silence. “Why don’t you just tell me where all the money has gone?” “Good boy,” his grandfather smiled as usual, “Trust me. They wouldn’t go down the drain.” These words made John sick as they were repeated every single day. “I can’t bear it any more! Now that you give me nothing but your smelly words, you are not my grandpa from now on!” On hearing this, grandfather drown himself in silence for a long time and then slowly moved himself to his bedroom. At this, John became restless, with his heart sinking and his mind flooded with conflicting thoughts.

In the depth of the night, a sound hit John’s ears. John curiously got up and carefully watched outside. He saw his old grandfather putting some notes and coins into an envelope. After that, he attached a message on it and sneaked outdoor. Curiosity urged John to follow and finally he spotted his grandfather put that envelope into a mailbox in front of a dirty and old shed. John couldn’t believe his eyes. He could never have imagined his grandfather should be the so-called God. With his eyes misted with tears, he couldn’t help rushing to his grandfather and hugging him tightly. “I’m so sorry for breaking your heart, grandpa.” “Forget it, my boy,” grandfather smiled as usual, patting him on the back. Undoubtedly, it was his dearest grandfather who made John the happiest grandson that day.

2. 概要写作

Colleges nowadays overvalue the results of tests, while many people think it’s unreasonable. On the one hand, a better test result doesn’t always mean a better future as it’s not so fair by taking extra courses and even taking drugs to increase their scores. On the other hand, most tests don’t reflect some of the vital skills and personal qualities. Therefore, colleges are supposed to focus more on students’ academic track as well as personalities, instead of tests results only.

十、塘下中学 章阁芝 (指导师:余小芬

1. . 读后续写

When they were eating dinner, John finally broke the silence. “I apologize for getting into an argument with you, but I have strong desire to be accompanied.” John exclaimed and started to sob uncontrollably with his chin on his chest and his eyes staring down. “Nothing serious, I adore you more than anything else in the whole world.” His grandfather smiled, caressing John’s hands tenderly. John raised his head, noticing his grandfather’s face was wrinkled, his hair was grey, but his eyes were like two stars, and they had a mild expression in them when they were shining at John, which did him good.

In the depth of night, a sound hit John’s ears. He covered himself and was trembling with his heart beating so violently, for he didn’t know what would happen. Suddenly, someone crept as if he were a thief. Then footsteps approached and stopped by the bed. The following morning, what astonished him most was that he found nothing lost. Instead, an envelope with a message and much money in it appeared. “Did God help me?” he cried in surprise. Jumping out of his bed, he dashed into the shop. Along the way, John felt every cell in his body woke up.

                                     

2. 概要写作

Great significance has been attached to exams by colleges. Getting better grades, students are admitted to better academies. Nevertheless, it can’t guarantee a great success of future. Having preparations and taking medicine are commonly used to do themselves a favor. In conclusion, these examinations are not directly related to showing students’ personalities. To a large extent, colleges are supposed to focus on students’ academic track rather than taking tests, which maybe beneficial to getting excellent graduates. (76 words)

                                                              

                                                              

                                                                   

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